Counselling for teenagers

I offer specialist counselling for teenagers, as well as younger children, individuals, couples and families. I was wondering how I would construct my first blog of 2016 when I met with two young people this week who caused me to reflect on the New Year’s Resolution tradition that exists in our culture.

A sixteen year old young Sudanese woman spoke about the powerlessness and pain she felt as she watched news reports of very young Syrian children who had been bombed out of homes and who were bereft of families that were buried in those homes, crying, alone on the street. She spoke of her anger at the Western military and at ISIS and how she felt that all sides of the conflicts in the Middle East were presiding over infanticide and genocide while insisting they all have morally stable arguments that enable them to act the way they do.

I spoke to a boy in year 9 who lacked the sparkle I usually associate with him. He told me that when he told his friends about his Christmas presents, one of which was a laptop, they seemed dismissive about when he had received. He told me he didn’t mind but I could see that he did. He said his mum had bought the lap top to help him with his studies.

Not for the first time I thought about the loneliness that sometimes comes into our lives. It makes us feel tiny and angry when we know that bad things happen to us or to someone else and we can do nothing to stop it. The same loneliness that comes to us when the careless crowd castes thoughtless comments at us then moves on, unaware that we have been left to question our validity in their society.

I thought about New Year’s Resolutions and if I would make one based on what I wanted for me (perhaps a fitter body, perhaps a business plan I have been putting off) or would I construct a resolution that incorporates the society I live in?

One thing is certain, following the discussions I had with these two young people I became aware that individualism and community cannot share the same space.

Where do you feel you most belong? If you would like to talk please get in touch,